It's Aliiiiiiiive! Hi again...

It's been officially two years since I've last been here. Boy have things changed! But, I'm trying to get back into the habit of blogging. It's a bit of a half-hearted return for now, but hopes it'll become like normal again. For those interested--which I can honestly assume isn't many after this long!--here's a bit of an update.

Biggest change of all: I up and moved to Tokyo to finish my bachelors degree. Let's just say it's a bit of an adjustment to move out for the first time and doing it across the ocean from home. Probably one of the biggest learning curves I've ever had. Probably would've helped if I'd improved my Japanese skill more before arriving, but alas.

So that happened roughly a year ago. Since then I've experienced many firsts that all people have to accomplish to become proper adults like the horror of discovering your milk sat too long and decided to start making cheese without your permission... Or learning how to do refrigerator tetris with your groceries because it's about the size of a five year old child... 

And then there are the other sorts of firsts like learning truly what humidity is. Nothing can compare to the Japanese summer at its height. It's the truth. I think the most disgusting day was about 98 (F) with 92% humidity. Which for those who are humidity virgins like I once was... it feels like it's about 105 (F) and you sweat from just standing outside.  Even more disgusting than the heat is the new set of life it brings about. The bugs.

Now, being a bit of a country girl back in the states, I'm confident in saying that most insects don't really bug me! But being from the nice and cool Pacific Northwest, I'd never had to deal with certain species of them. For anyone into anime, you know the cliche of the Japanese summer filled with the cicadas (semi in Japanese) chirping one loud chorus. It's true. Even if it's hot as the devil's balls, it isn't summer here until all you here 23/7 (they sleep about an hour a day it seems--I'm a light sleeper) are those dang cicadas going wee-wee-wee. If you want to hear for yourself, click here. Besides being slightly annoying they're mostly harmless, though I seem to attract them. Just a little shocking to have one swoop and land on your shoulder then scream in your ear. I just wanted to walk outside, Japan!

No. The one thing that really gets to me are the goddamned srgsnrungjserkfef ROACHES. 

Not only are they blasted fast, they're so disgusting. I shudder just thinking about it.

It hasn't been all bad, thankfully, despite the major adjustments. I've made a bunch of friends and grown into a person that I can be proud of even if the road to it was a bit bumpy. Japan got way more tears than I ever thought it would receive, that's for sure. 

I haven't been able to write much for anything, even though I wish I could. But I know my stories will be there for me when I'm ready to devote my attention to them properly. First things first; pass classes and graduate ASAP! 

I feel like I could blather on about a lot of probably useless things, so I'll leave it here for now. Hope to see you all soon! 

Long Time No See

It's been awhile since I've been on here and lots of things have changed. I did only use this blog for writing/my thoughts concerning that and the like, but now I'm going to be opening it up to include ...pretty much anything and everything I can think of.  While I'm not sure how exactly it's going to go, I hope you all can stick around with me :)

I will continue to talk about writing and my process and everything that entails, I just won't only be talking about it.

And here's a random sentence that makes absolutely no sense for you all!
The bobs plotter scratches beside the precedent.


Hope to see you all soon. :)

Humoring my Edit-Self

Have you ever gone through your MS, editing away like we always should and then suddenly! It hits you. "THE SIDE-KICK WHO'S REALLY NOT SUPPOSED TO BE LIKABLE IS MORE LIKABLE THAN MY MC!!"?

I hope not. It's a rather upsetting thing! (Trying some humor on for size, folks.) I recently (very recently. As in today, recently.) discovered that this travesty had occurred in my NEARLY PERFECT MANUSCRIPT (according to my dog maybe? and probably not even him... ). It's a shock, it is. Like finding out that your dog actually DOES know what you're saying and pretends to be dumb to trick you or that your stuffed animals can more themselves around at night! (oh no! Censorship~)

The mind just reels! 

"How could this happen?" 

"I'm just so awesome and amazing and everyone wants to be me!"

"I got an agent just by staring at their twitter account!"

"I have a love triangle, twice! Between a brainiac werewolf who's like a genius with everything and knows a lot of fancy stuff and a goofy vampire with the most awesome, sparkly smile that you've ever had the chance of being bedazzled by!"

And so forth.

So of course, like any natural amazing person like I seriously am, I had a talk with this little inner voice that sounds an awful lot like Jessie and I came up with EVEN MORE AWESOME. Yes. It is possible, my friends. I. Have become awesomer.

Just wait until I breeze through submission in a minute and get ONE KAZILLION-BAJILLION copies printed in every language the world has EVER KNOWN.

So, how do you guys like the new layout? :D I think it's wicked. School is officially out so I am now back in business in the blogging world! I can't wait to read all of you~!

I hope you enjoyed my attempt at humor. :P

G is for Good Ideas and GAH!

A short post today because my plot is shaping up so well that I don't want to leave it for too long! School was torture today, haha. My fingers kept itching to grab a marker and get all those words out of me. I've found that plotting in a notebook instead of on my laptop is helping me out immensely. 

It's kind of weird to think of, but I can remember doing this all through high school. Pulling out notebooks in the middle of math and plotting out the latest idea that popped in my head instead of taking notes on ...some geometry problem. (See? I can't even remember a name for one!) I did this all the time back then. It got me to wondering, when did I stop using paper and go to the keyboard?

I honestly don't know why, but I know from now on that I'll be plotting on paper instead of on screen.

As for the "GAH!" Well... let's just say that in Botany today, we were learning about the difference in soils between Western Washington and Eastern Washington. (And yes, I mean the state. :P) The reason is because of glaciers and massive floods from the ice age melting--but that's not the point. Someone in the class asked... a really ...awkward question. I was both surprised and annoyed. I kept thinking, "Who in their right mind asks that??" (Even the prof looked very awkward trying not to offend her while she answered.)

Have you guys ever had to deal with situations cause by someone? How'd you handle it?

C is for Confidence and Change

Yup, there's that word again: Change. I am (yet again) changing things up. I can't really say I like changing things up (in my story, real life is a bit different), but it's one of those things that's necessary. I've heard so many people say that the best thing you can do is "Follow your gut" and my gut is telling me that something just isn't right with my story.

Of course, this is the who knows how many-th change I've done and I have yet to even finish my dang story. Ugh. Everyone's journey is different, but I wish mine would find a path and stick to it for a few! This is getting frustrating. I like what I have. I really do like everything that I've thought of. I keep trying to think of ways to make it different but keep the same elements (I'm hoping that will work...) All of this right after I had a breakthrough, too.

When it comes to change, I always wonder: "Do I really need this?"
"Will I know when to stop?"
"When will this finally be right?"

To me, change in my MS is both good and something I dread. It's one of those things I need to learn to learn to accept--and welcome.

I think one of the reasons why change is so hard for me is because that evil little voice that everybody (especially us writers) whispers words that no sane person would ever say to another even in the darkest mood--I hope not, at least. We truly are the hardest on ourselves.

It took Cosmetology school--where I was forced to work with the public for 10hrs each school day--to gain basic confidence in myself. To be able to tell myself, "Yeah, I'm kind of pretty today. Yeah, I can cut hair pretty good--but I can color hair even better. My classmates know a lot, but I know more. I'm actually good."

Until I decided to actually write out a story with the intent to publish, I'd never given my writing a thought. I was the only one who was going to see it (for the most part) so what did it matter? It isn't like that anymore. I've had more doubts about my writing in the past couple months than I have in my entire lifetime. I know I'll gain my confidence back--maybe when all the changes stop??--but until then, I'm just going to keep swimming through the negativity, waiting for the day when the sun'll shine in my brain and the angels come out going "HALLELUJAH"

I wouldn't mind if that happened soon... Just a heads up, brain. 

What do you guys think about change? Do you like it? Hate it? And how do you stay confident in your writing? Until tomorrow--D-day!

Changes

So, it seems like I'm doomed to never get to the double digits. Once again, I'm changing up my plot. It's kind of frustrating to realize what you have is just short of working out. It's enough, but it's not great. Generally, I think we all aim for the great, or even the amazing sort of stuff. I'd like to hope that my WIP will eventually be great.

I've been debating between whether or not I'll go in a completely different direction or just adjust it a little. I could combine the basic structure of this WIP with the idea for another, or I could just tweak it. Decisions, decisions. 

The hardest thing is that I'd love to keep all of what I've already written and not change it. It's also hard to change the story idea I had only because it'd been running rampant in my mind. As I've chewed it over in my mind, it's getting easier, but, there's still moments of doubt. 

Change is always hard. Sometimes it makes me want to give up, but, haha, I'll never let that happen. I don't care how many times I'll have to do this, I'm not going to stop. 

Hopefully--like the good old saying--the third time's a charm.

Falling In Love

Has it seriously been a week since I last posted? Crazy! Doesn't feel like that at all. I've got to get onto a schedule for this.

I cranked out my first scene (of the revamped story) and what did I discover? That Emelie was about as interesting as white bread and butter. Not good. I'd spent so much time getting into Axel's head that I didn't even think of getting into Emelie's--every other character besides Axel included here. Such a bad habit!

But, as with most problems, it was fixed. Phew! Out of all the years I've been writing, I don't think I've ever realized just how much of a discovery process this can be. It's amazing. I love learning, so these continual discoveries are right up my alley.

As I've continued on to my second scene--shooting Axel with as many of Cupid's arrows as I can manage before he bleeds out--I can't help but feel proud. He's falling for her, and falling hard--and I'm falling in love with the idea of them falling in love. Sounds a bit ridiculous because I know the outcome but, it's the truth!

It's amazing to feel what Axel is feeling--or at least, an extension of it. I only hope it'll convey to readers too! Back to the grindstone (if Luca doesn't preoccupy my time by eating his feet or growling at me to do who the heck knows what)!